In a discussion during a marriage renewal course, a common area among the wives was noted – the mother-in-law (MIL). It seems that most of them had difficulties with their MIL. An interview with those “difficult” MILs later revealed that they also had problems with their own MILs. Even more interesting is the fact that they faced almost identical problems as their daughters-in-law. Why do we have to pass the problems down? Have we not learn in Scripture, to do unto others what we want them to do to us? Of course, these do not apply only to in-laws problem. They are applicable in all aspects of life, even among husbands and wives.

A suggestion to the problem was to be able to “give and take.” I would say that there are more “take” than “give”. It is always more difficult to give first. But have we not also learned in Scripture that “it is more blessed to give than to receive”? Yes, we all know about this but often find it difficult to carry out. That, however, does not give us the excuse to ignore it. Spouses tend to wait for the each other to “give” first. As such, many misunderstandings occur.

What about the “take” part? If we merely just take what is given to us, then it is part of the problem. We have to learn to take with gladness and thanksgiving. Whether we are getting the short end of the stick or a big bonus, we receive them with thanksgiving to God. If we can do that, then many of the problems between in-laws, husbands and wives, siblings and other relationships can be solved.

The word of God teaches us how to live in harmony with one another. Do not neglect them because they are difficult to do, or it is ideal but this is real life. God is the Creator, in Him is life. Therefore, His word is life. We must work at living out the word of God for our own sake.

God bless!